I Can't Smile Without You
by Sybil Marvin
Summary: When the world’s crumbling down, there is only one thing that can hold a man together. When HIS world is crumbling, SHE is the one that’s holding him together, till he somehow managed to pull through. But when it’s HER world that’s crumbling...
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** Hello, this is my first fanfic ever, and what better story to write than on my favorite pairing, IchiHime! Anyway, for those who read it, please leave a review. I rellly wish to know where do I stand as a writer and whether I should continue writing or stop. Thanks in advance for readers and reviewers!!

**Disclaimer:** Bleach belongs to Kubo Tite.

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_When the world's crumbling down, there is only one thing that can hold a man together._

_When HIS world is crumbling, SHE is the one that's holding him together, till he somehow managed to pull through._

_But when it's HER world that's crumbling, he wasn't sure if HE is strong enough to help her pull through…_

* * * * *

Ichigo had been pacing back and forth over the last five hours. His muscles were screaming in pain with every movement he made, and there were blood all over him, HER blood… But none of that mattered. His thought was only on one thing, and on ONE PERSON only.

Aside from the orange haired substitute shinigami, altogether there were seven people cramped inside the 4th Squad Waiting Room, right outside the Emergency Room where one of their beloved friend was fighting for her life, and all seven had that same battered and worried look as Ichigo's plastered on their faces.

Chad's was hidden underneath his saggy hair while Renji tried to hide his behind closed eyes, though his frown betrayed his emotions. Ishida had been unconsciously pushing up his glasses more frequently than usual in an attempt to calm his nerve. Matsumoto Rangiku had been bawling her eyes out earlier and was now comforted by a very solemn Rukia. A pink-haired man sat silently in the corner of the room, having said nothing after barging in suddenly into the room nearly knocking down the door. Even the always calm and professional Captain of the 10th Squad barely managed to mask his worried look.

It had been five hours, and none of them had moved from their spots, waiting patiently for someone to open the door to the Emergency Room and provide them with some news, some acknowledgement of what was going to happen to their dear friend.

Vice Captain Kotetsu Isane came out some times earlier, announcing that the patient's condition was finally stabilized for the time being. However, she also mentioned about her not fully out of death's grip yet, and that no one except Isane herself and Captain Unohana were to be near the patient, at least not until she regain consciousness. Then Isane went inside the Emergency Room to her captain's side, monitoring the patient under painful scrutiny and preparing for emergency measures should her condition grew worse.

Renji shifted his legs, and he groaned as pain shot through his muscles. The agony resulted from sitting almost completely still for five long hours. He opened his eyes, and cursed at the sight of orange blob moving non-stop in front of him. '_Damn it! Doesn't Ichigo know when to stop beating himself up over everything that happened_?'

He opened his mouth to say something but stopped when he heard a voice, "Ichigo…"

To Renji's annoyance, Ichigo paid no attention whatsoever to Rukia's calling. He was about to get up and punch him in the face to make him stop torturing himself when the Waiting Room's door flew open.

Ichigo stopped in his track. His mouth gaped open as he stared at three figures stepping into the room, unaware that his expression mirrored everyone inside the Waiting Room, except for Hacchi who seemed unfazed by the appearance of three very familiar people; Urahara Kisuke, Shihouin Yoruichi, and…

"DAD…?"

* * * * *

It was cold outside. After the three of them burst in and startled nearly everyone, his father had dragged Ichigo outside the 4th Squad's barrack. The wind was blowing softly, but it did nothing to soothe the inner turmoil inside of him. He'd been trying to deal with the sinking feeling that he is on the verge of losing a very important person in his life, and then his dad showed up… in a shinigamis's outfit? There's only so much that his mind can take…

"Sorry if I shocked you…"

Oh yeah, _THAT_ was an understatement.

"But…, a WONDERFULLY RESPONSIBLE father like me would do anything to help my IDIOT teenage son who'd been crying over his dying lo~"

Ichigo's fist connected with Kurosaki Isshin's face, sending him stumbled facedown.

"SHUT UP! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK SHOWING UP LIKE THAT IS SUPPOSED TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER?"

Isshin got up, his comical expression was replaced a concern look as he let his gaze fall on his son, "Really, now's not the time to completely shutting everyone out. Especially when things might turn out the worst."

"I'm not…"

"You need to be strong FOR HER. If she comes out of it alive, it wouldn't do her any good seeing you like this. You need the strength from all of us who cares about you, that's why I rushed here with Kisuke and Yoruichi-san as soon as I heard what happened. I'm sorry if my sudden appearance shocked you, but I just wanted to be there for you, something I had failed countless time before…"

"Dad…"

Isshin smiled at his boy. His heart was breaking at the sight in front of him. He knew he was not being a good father for not coming clean with his identity, for not lending a hand in his son's fight. He knew Ichigo had suffered a lot lately. He knew Ichigo had been putting his life in danger constantly ever since he acquired that shinigami power, when he'd gone to Soul Society to save Rukia, and especially when he went to Hueco Mundo to save Inoue Orihime.

He knew Ichigo had risked his life trying to save her, yet somehow she was hurt, and Isshin feared what had happened to Ichigo when Masaki died would happen again if Inoue Orihime were to die. In fact, the impact of Orihime's death on Ichigo might be worse than Masaki's, considering he actually had a power to protect Orihime yet he still failed, when back then he was nothing but a helpless child.

"I swore I'd protect her without fail," Ichigo's voice came out in a hoarse whisper, snapping Isshin out of his deep thought. He looked over at his son who was staring out into the distance, obviously thinking what he had been thinking earlier.

"I've failed once and I promised myself this time, I would not repeat the same mistake all over again."

"Ichigo…"

The substitute shinigami turned to face his father, "Dad… What if I fail again this time…?"

Isshin was speechless.

"I don't know what I'd do if I lose her. I can't face everyone who cares so much about her… They all had faith in me, that I would save her… If she died, I can't stand it if they forgive me in the end! I can't! Even she…, even she said it's not my fault before she…"

Ichigo stopped, no longer having the strength to keep talking, since he's using all of his remaining energy biting back the tears threatening to break through. He clenched his fist together, so hard that he could feel his fingers burying into his flesh. He's a man, damn it! '_I can't cry!_'

Isshin watched silently as his son fighting back tears. His heart broke yet again when he noticed a single tear rolling down Ichigo's cheek. He noticed Ichigo's fists clenched even harder, the knuckles were now white over the pressure, his brows furrowing deeper and he was biting his lips together in a desperate effort to keep more tears flowing down.

He reached out his hand, wanting to comfort Ichigo but stopped when he realized that by doing that, he might only weakened Ichigo's resistance against his burst of tears. Knowing Ichigo, crying would seem as a sign of defeat to him and he definitely didn't need that.

For once in his life, Kurosaki Isshin was dumbfounded. He wanted to do something, to say something to ease the young man in front of him… But his mind couldn't come up with anything.

"Ichigo… Just how much does that girl means to you…?"

"What…?"

_Oh shit!_ He hadn't mean to say that out loud. He'd merely been thinking to himself when the words unknowingly slipped through. He stared at Ichigo, who in turn stood gaping at him, his expressions completely unreadable.

Millions of thoughts and feelings were jumbled inside Ichigo's head as his father's words were replayed over over and again. _'…how much does that girl means to you…_?' _How much…? How much…?_

He didn't know exactly how much she means to him, but that she is very important to him. She's very important that if she were suddenly gone his world would be so empty. The realization hit him and suddenly he felt like he was drowning, as if the world is spinning around and sucking him into a bottomless pit, crushing everything around him, shattering his world… She was the one who saved him before when his world was crumbling. If she's gone, what should he do? What can he do when the source of his strength was gone? _What…?_

"Kurosaki!"

Ichigo swirled around towards the voice, still in daze, unable to grip the emotions and realizations around him. Ishida stood before them, slightly breathless. Obviously he had been running

Ichigo mentally steeled himself. Ishida must be bringing some kind of important news about Orihime, which was the only explanation for his frantic rush to get to him. It could be good news, _but it could also be bad news…_

"Inoue-san's woken up."

And Ichigo felt a ray of light seeping through the darkness of his life, bringing hope…

* * * * *


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note**: Here's my second chapter. Sorry that I took so long to update my story. And dear Readers and Reviewers, sorry if this chapter isn't very good. I find that writing this chapter is very challenging. Since English isn't my first language, I don't usually think in English so it's hard for me to write descriptions in English and I think I'm very weak in writing dialogues. Anyway, I really hope you guys enjoy this chapter, and review if you have time, of course. After all, a writer's greatest joy is when people read his/her story. Enjoy!! XD

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Bleach.

* * *

_If loving you means losing you…_

_Then I would rather not have loved at all…_

* * * * *

He had been very anxious to see her when he'd heard Ishida's words earlier that he'd been practically running towards the Emergency Room. But as soon as the three of them reached the door to the room, he suddenly felt as if his legs were betraying him. He stopped, his muscles no longer able to move.

Isshin, aware of his son's abrupt stop, shot a questioning look at him.

"I can't…"

As much as he wanted to see her, he knew that he couldn't face her yet. He was scared. Scared that as soon as he saw her face, he's going to lose every little amount of strength he'd been desperately clinging to and broke down in front of her. He knew that if she came out of this ordeal alive, she's going to need everyone's support. HE wanted to be able to support her, wanted to be able to help her get back on her feet and showing his weakness to her wouldn't do her any good.

Isshin and Ishida had both stopped next to him, obviously impatient to get inside but still waiting for him to change his mind.

"Go on ahead…"

Ishida was about to shot out some witty remarks about how pathetic Ichigo was being when he felt Isshin's strong grip on his shoulder, pulling the Quincy along as his other hand opened the door to the Emergency Door and walked in, leaving Ichigo behind.

* * * * *

The room was small but somehow they all managed to squeeze in, towering over a very pale-looking girl who was lying on a bed in the middle of the room. The fact that Hacchi's presence alone took almost half of the room's space didn't help very much either. A few "Oww's!" and "Arghh's!" were heard when they accidentally stepped on each other's foot.

Rangiku and Rukia both went to sit on the right and left sides of Orihime's bed. Yoruichi and Urahara stood behind Rukia while the other took their positions standing around Orihime's bed. Captain Unohana Retsu and her Vice-Captain watched from the corner of the room, giving some sort of privacy. They were reluctant to leave the room for fear that Orihime might fall unconscious again.

When Isshin and Ishida went into the room, Isshin gave a polite nod to Captain Unohana and walked over to Urahara's side while Ishida squeezed in between Renji and Hitsugaya.

Inoue Orihime looked so fragile and broken yet still so beautiful under the cover. She appeared to be much thinner than she had been, and there were bruises on her face. They knew that there were definitely some on her body as well and silently uttered a prayer that they were hidden under the cover for the sight of bruises on her face was enough to make their hearts went out of pity for the girl.

Long auburn hair framed her pale face while her big gray eyes blinked a few times as she scanned the faces surrounding her through her thick, long lashes. A serene expression grazed her face, and there were no signs that she was in pain. Despite being almost dead a few moments ago, her eyes were shining brightly now when she recognized her friends all around her and slowly, a small smile formed on her lips.

Relief washed over Rangiku when she saw Orihime's smile. She wanted to envelop the young human girl in her bosom but refrained herself, knowing that such physical contact was not appropriate for someone who had been battling death earlier. Instead, she cried again. "Oh… Orihime-chan, I'm so glad you're alive…" she choked out between sobs.

Orihime's small smile stretched into a bigger grin, as she turned to look at Rangiku. "What are you talking about, Rangiku-san? Of course I am…"

Then she returned her gaze to every person in the room. "Everyone… Sorry if I made you guys worried," then, a pause, "I'm so glad everyone's okay too…"

Rangiku sobbed louder, touched by her words. Even when her own life was in danger, Orihime still had time to worry about other people's well being. Rukia wiped silent tears from her eyes. Renji muttered a quiet "Hmm.." while Chad flashed her his trademark thumbs-up. Hitsugaya smiled back to her and Ishida calmly said, "The feeling's mutual, Inoue-san," as he pushed his glasses up his nose. Isshin, Urahara and Yoruichi flashed Orihime a calming smile. Suddenly, to everyone's surprise, Hacchi started to cry loudly.

"I'm sorry that I couldn't do anything to help you earlier, Orihime-chan!" he cried out.

"Everyone… Just being by my side was enough… It made me know that I have important people wanting me to stay alive… And that's what kept me alive… Captain Unohana is a great healer, you guys shouldn't worry so much… I promise I'll get better as soon as I can…"

Urahara waved his fan, "Now, now… Don't push yourself too hard, Inoue-san. You should take your time and rest as much as possible."

"Speaking of which, I think we should all leave her to rest for the time being," Captain Unohana piped in, ever so concerned with her patient.

"Yeah…" Yoruichi agreed. Hitsugaya murmured his agreement as well. The white-haired boy had been rather quite, there seemed to be something weighing his mind at the moment.

Orihime gave them another appreciative smile as the turned and exit the room. "Thanks, everyone…"

Rangiku gave her a peck on the cheek and left. Rukia squeezed her shoulder lightly and started to walk away when she felt Orihime's hand suddenly grab her.

"Kurosaki-kun… Is he alright…?"

Rukia smiled, "Ichigo's fine, don't worry..."

"Thanks, Kuchiki-san…"

* * * * *

Shortly afterwards, Isshin, Urahara, Yoruichi, Hitsugaya and Hacchi along with Captain Unohana left the 4th Squad Barracks and went to the 1st Squad's after being summoned with a Hell Butterfly, bringing the message of Captain Commander Yamamoto Genryuusai, calling them forth to attend an emergency meeting.

Rukia, Rangiku, Renji, Ishida, Chad and Ichigo were left behind at the Waiting Room. Their worn-out bodies needed rest after having fought battles after battles. All of them had suffered near-fatal injuries in the war. All of them, except for Ichigo were almost completely healed, but their energy wouldn't be fully restored until they had their much-needed rest.

Despite their body screaming for rest, their heart insisted that they should stay by their nakama's side. The silence in the atmosphere was deafening. So many underlying tensions. So many unanswered questions between them.

The door to the Emergency Room opened and a very calm Kotetsu Isane, which was a total contrast to the other six persons present in the room, stepped out. She took a long and lingering look at all of them.

"You guys really need to rest."

Ishida spoke out, "We understand. But we feel the need to stay and look out after Inoue-san."

Isane looked over at Ishida, "We are trained in healing, Ishida-san. Have you absolutely no faith in our ability?"

Reddened, Ishida pushed up his glass. He hadn't meant to offend the 4th Squad but he was really worried about Orihime. Worried enough to not want to leave her even with the world's best healer without him watching over.

"I'm sorry, Vice-Captain Isane, but you have to understand, we almost lost a very dear friend to us… What if… What if that had happened without us knowing it? Without us by her side…?" Rukia's words ended in almost a whisper.

Isane sighed. Having faced deaths of friends and squad members herself, she understood how all of them must have felt.

"Please trust in us. I promise she will be fine." Then, Isane added, "I myself would be on duty tonight."

Renji, who'd been sitting quietly at a corner suddenly stood up. "She's right. Inoue would still get better without us meddling around. Let the 4th Squad do what they do best."

"There, there. It's decided then. You kids can go and get some sleep. I, myself need a drink to regain my energy." Rangiku glanced over at Renji, "You coming?"

Renji grunted in agreement.

"I'm staying here."

Unsurprisingly, those words came out of Ichigo's mouth. Rukia sighed. '_Ichigo can really be stubborn sometimes…'_

"Kurosaki-san, you don't have to."

Ichigo turned to face Isane, determination flashed in his eyes. "I want to."

Isane sighed again. She didn't know Kurosaki Ichigo well enough but recalling how that boy had acted prior to Orihime's admittance to the Emergency Room, and from her brief encounter with him up on the Soukyoku Hill, she knew that once Ichigo had made his mind, he's not one to be deterred. It also seemed to her that out of all Inoue Orihime's nakamas, the substitute shinigami was the one who takes this incident the worst.

"Then, I'll stay too."

It was Rukia.

"No." Then, Ichigo looked over to Ishida and Chad. "You two get some rest too."

"What's that supposed to mean? She's my friend too, you know. Everyone wants the best for her. Don't try to act as if this only affects you. Try to get it through your thick skull that~"

Renji's hand on her shoulder stopped Rukia.

"Renji…"

Their eyes met. Renji's were full of understanding and he silently begged her to just let go of the argument. She wanted to protest, but finally she gave in. She knew Orihime was important to Ichigo, in fact, she was important enough to him that he'd willingly go against Soul Society and had intended to invade Hueco Mundo alone to save her. She knew Ichigo had blamed himself for letting Orihime got hurt after he'd vowed to protect her, and she'd noticed they had formed a closer bond throughout the times in Hueco Mundo. A bond she herself couldn't understand… '_Perhaps Renji's right. Maybe it's for the best to leave Ichigo alone with Orihime…'_

Rukia forced a smile. "Okay, then. Come, Renji, Vice-Captain Matsumoto. We're going."

Rukia grabbed Renji's hand and caught Rangiku by the wrist before leading them both out of the room.

Ishida and Chad followed suit, knowing that was the best thing to do since arguing with Ichigo would mean like arguing with a brick wall. Ishida managed a "We're leaving, Kurosaki" and bowed as he walked pass Kotetsu Isane. Chad merely flashed a thumb at Ichigo and bowed at Isane too on his way out.

* * * * *

In the 1st Squad Barracks, tensions were brewing as well. Captain Commander Yamamoto Genryuusai had summoned his captains, or what's left of them, to attend an emergency meeting.

Out of the remaining ten captains, of the 13 Protection Squads, only five were present. Soi Fon and the Covert Ops Squad were patrolling the vicinity, while Kurotsuchi Mayuri with his Vice-Captain had locked themselves inside the 12th Squad Barracks to carry on some research. Zaraki Kenpachi and his pink-haired Vice-Captain were pulling their usual disappearing tricks. Kyouraku Shunsui and Captain Komamura were in the 4th Squad Barracks, recovering from injuries as a result of their fights with the Primera Espada and Tousen Kaname respectively.

Aside from the Captain Commander himself, there were Captain Unohana, Captain Ukitake, Captain Kuchiki Byakuya and the young Captain Hitsugaya.

Also present were the Vaizards, Hirako Shinji, Mugurama Kensei and Hacchi. The rest of the Vaizards were still treated for their injuries as well. Then there were three other faces, the ones who were once a part of the Soul Society, Urahara Kisuke, Shihouin Yoruichi and Kurosaki Isshin. Some of them had vowed to never even lift a hand to help Soul Society but in dire situations as one they were in, personal revenges had to take a backseat for the survival of mankind.

"Sorry to have summoned you in such a short notice, but there were few urgent matters need to be brought to light." Yamamoto Genryuusai paused tentatively and glanced across the room. His gaze lingered on the Urahara, Yoruichi Isshin and the Vaizards who no longer served under Soul Society orders but were kind enough to offer their help to Soul Society. "And long time no see, my respected former captains."

"First of all, the Kyoka Suigetsu."

Expectant silence.

"The remnants of the Kyoka Suigetsu were brought here by the 12th Squad. However, after few hours had passed, the _zanpakutou_ hadn't returned to its true form yet."

Few surprised gasps were heard. As long as the hilt wasn't destroyed, a broken _zanpakutou_ can return to its normal form.

"It was reported that the sword was 'empty', with no hints of spiritual presence in it."

More surprised gasps.

Ukitake was the first to actually spoke out, "That's impossible. A _zanpakutou's_ soul can never leave the sword itself."

"Captain Soi Fon and the Covert Ops were scouring the place where the sword was destroyed for any remnants that could have been left there. As of now, we have no insight on this matter except for one speculation."

"What was it?" Shinji's strained voice was heard.

"The sword's soul somehow left the soul and now resides inside another soul."

Slightly amused, Urahara flapped open his fan, "Hmm… Interesting…"

Isshin shot an irritated look at Urahara. "Is that even possible?"

"It was merely speculation as of now. But it is best to take precautions for there's a possibility that the sword's powers could fall into yet another wrong hand this time," Yamamoto Genryuusai stated calmly.

"And then, there's the matter of Inoue Orihime."

* * * * *


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note :** *stares with wide eyes* Whoa! What is this? An update! XD

I know I haven't updated this story for like, four months or so. Honestly, I was upset because I didn't have a good idea on how I'm going to develop this story. But then, surprisingly, you people still reviewed it and some faved it, and it just made me feel so guilty. I never intended to delete this story and I meant to work on this story later, like, a couple of months later, but I changed my mind when I received another review yesterday. Well, the most recent review I got was from **anonfan **who told me I shouldn't let this story go to waste. And that's what got me to start working. Chapter 3 was already halfway done when I put this story on hold, so I just continued where I left off.

The next chapter is going to be a flashback at what happened and how Orihime ended up in the 4th Squad's Barracks. I hope you guys enjoy this story, and review please? No flames, ok? And if you guys have the time, why don't you check out my other fic, **Detrás de la Luna. **This is the fic I'm putting all my time and energy into, and personally, I think it is my best work so far. Have a good day everyone! =)

**Disclaimer :** I don't own Bleach.

* * *

Stray of morning lights shone through the window of the Emergency Room in the 4th Squad's Barracks where a certain auburn-haired teenager laid asleep.

A pair of large gray eyes fluttered open, then squinted as they adjusted slowly to the bright morning light. She scanned the room she was in, taking in the unfamiliar surroundings. '_Where am I? I certainly wasn't in my apartment. Could it be… that I'm still in Hueco Mundo?'_ She shuddered a bit at that thought, remembering the cold walls and the emptiness of that dreaded place.

Her thoughts suddenly stopped as her gaze fell upon an orange blob on her bed. _Kurosaki-kun…_ He seemed to have fallen asleep while sitting beside her bed, his arms on her bed, supporting his head.

_He must be really uncomfortable sleeping like that…_

She reached out her hand to shake his shoulder, wanted to wake him up. But her hand suddenly stopped and reached hesitantly for his hair, _somehow, somehow, that mess of orange hairs was too distracting_, and she ran her fingers on Ichigo's hair.

_It felt so soft… I never thought a guy's hair would feel like this… And the colour, they were so bright… They were shining like gold under the light…_

"Hm!?"

Startled, Orihime pulled her hand abruptly. Her eyes widened when Ichigo's head suddenly jerked up and finding herself locking gaze with him. His deep brown eyes pierced into her very soul, brows furrowed, scowl deepened and a look of concern flashed across his face as he took in her features.

Blushing, Orihime try to break out Ichigo's intense gaze. "Kurosaki-kun..?" she called out softly.

Ichigo blinked. Relief flowed through him seeing that Orihime had gotten much better than yesterday. Slowly, his furrowed brows relaxed. His scowl formed into a small smile, a smile that only seemed to be reserved for her.

"I'm so glad you're okay, Inoue…"

Then she smiled. She smiled brightly that Ichigo swore it was brighter than the ray of light shining into the room. "Heheh… It's all thanks to Kurosaki-kun."

Suddenly fascinated by the sight before him, Ichigo watched as she started rambling about how she'd never got sick ever since she was little. He watched as she blurted about how she wished she could modify herself to become a robot so she could help him fight.

Her sweet voice was melodious to his ears. And her lips… Their movements suddenly left him fixated. They looked so pink and luscious now, so unlike their appearance last night. Never lifting his gaze from her lips, he reached out his hand, wanted to feel whether they are as soft as they looked.

Orihime's widened when Ichigo's thumb touch her lips. Her heart thrummed violently against her chest as he traced his thumb along her lips.

"K-Kuro~"

And suddenly, Ichigo's lips were on hers.

Her senses were knocked out of the window. Her heart felt like they almost burst open as Ichigo's warm mouth enveloped hers.

It was awkward. It was sloppy. It was far from perfect. But it was their firsts. To Orihime, it was the best feeling in the world to have Ichigo's hand on the back on her neck, while his other hand caressed her cheek softly. As Ichigo deepened his kisses, she sighed in pleasure, giving him an access into her mouth, and they had their first tastes of each other.

_I always thought kissing Kurosaki-kun would feel different. I thought he would taste like strawberries… Instead, he tested like… DRIED BLOOD?_

Her eyes popped open suddenly. Horror gripped through her as images of Ichigo almost dying played again and again in her mind. Reflexively, she gave Ichigo's body a hard push.

Ichigo's eyes went wide with shock. _What have I done?_

"Inoue…"

She kept her head bowed, afraid to meet his gaze.

"I-I'm sorry, Kurosaki-kun. But, could you please leave me alone? I'm not feeling very well right now…"

Ichigo noticed her thin fingers curling tightly on her blanket. They were trembling, and she never looked as fragile as she did now. Ichigo felt his heart thudding painfully at the sight of the small girl on the bed.

_She must have hated what I did to her. Damn it! Why do I always screw things up?_

"Kurosaki-kun…"

Ichigo stood up. He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, forcing a weak smile at her.

"I should let you rest. Sorry if I disturbed you, Inoue…"

He began walking away, but then he paused when he reached the door. He turned around to look at her. "About that kiss earlier, I promise it won't happen again."

Still, she gave him no reply.

"I'm leaving then, Inoue."

Ichigo stepped out of the room, closing the door softly behind him.

And on her bed, Orihime burst into tears.

* * * * *

A few rooms away, Hitsugaya Toushirou sat by Hinamori Momo's bed. The Vice-Captain was resting, having been cured from the wound inflicted by Aizen's _Kyoka Suigetsu_.

"Shiro-chan…"

If circumstances were different, he would have been annoyed by that childish nickname. But at that moment, he was too grateful that he could still hear her voice that he couldn't care less about how she called him.

"Yeah?"

"Go to sleep. You have been watching over me non-stop for a couple of days now."

The white-haired _shinigami_ looked over at Hinamori. When his sword pierced through her, he thought he would lose her for sure. It was something he would rather not feel again, and that was why he refused to leave her side. It was as if he was afraid that she would disappear if he weren't there.

"I can sleep here," he answered finally.

"Shiro-chan…"

"I think it's about time you listen to me."

"You're beginning to act more and more like a Captain," she teased, smiling at him.

"I am a Captain!"

"Fine, fine. Just sit there quietly or I wouldn't be able to sleep."

Hitsugaya muttered an agreement and watched as Hinamori rolled to her side and closed her eyes. Silence engulfed the room and Hitsugaya was about to drowse off when Hinamori called him.

"Shiro-chan?"

"Hm…"

"Is Inoue-chan alright?"

"She better be."

"If something bad happened to her, I would feel very guilty."

"Me too."

"She saved my life. If it weren't for her, I wouldn't be here."

"She saved a lot of lives that day."

"Hm… She did. I owe her a lot…" Hinamori continued to mumble, her eyes were half-closed now. "Promise me, Shiro-chan… that you would never let anything bad happen to her…"

"Yeah…"

* * * * *

Isshin watched his son coming out of Inoue Orihime's room. He raised an eyebrow when he noticed Ichigo's scowl and that his brows were furrowed even deeper than they usually did.

"Ichigo!" he called out and the orange-haired boy jumped. _He must have been deep in his thoughts_, Isshin mused.

He waved his hand, motioning his son to come join him. He watched disapprovingly as the boy walked weakly towards him.

"What's up with that gloomy face? I'm sure I can take you down with one punch if I attack you right now!" Isshin said to his son once the boy reached his side, pumping his hand energetically in the air.

"I'm not in the mood to fight with you."

"WHOA!! What's with the cold reply?" The bearded man reached inside his shinigami outfit and took out a chained locket. He opened it and Ichigo could see a picture of his mother.

"My dear Masaki! Our son had been so cold since he hit puberty! What am I to do?" Isshin cried, holding his deceased wife's picture in his hands.

_Idiot!_ Ichigo thought. _I can't believe he carries mom's picture everywhere he go_.

"Stop it! You look so silly right now!" Ichigo snapped at his father, suddenly feeling too tired for one of his antics at that moment.

Isshin glanced at his son and saw that the boy was being serious. He put the locket back. Then he reached his hand and patted his son lightly on the shoulder.

"If there is something you need to talk about, I'm right here."

"I don't know…"

"Was it about Orihime-chan?"

"Why do you think it's about her?"

"One, you've just came out of her room. Two, seeing how you acted last night, it's easy for me to make that guess."

Ichigo weighed the options in his mind before answering his father. Truth was, he really needed to talk to someone about Orihime, but it would mean he'd have to tell his father about the kiss…

_To hell with it!_

"I kissed her."

It was not a shocking news to Isshin. He pretty much expected that to happen sooner or later. He'd seen how his son acted differently around that girl, and after seeing Ichigo at his breaking point when Orihime's life was in danger, that had sealed Isshin's conviction. His son was falling for that big-breasted beauty.

"So? You didn't like it?"

"No! I like it! And that's what made me feel guilty."

"Why so?"

"She's my friend. I shouldn't have kissed her, but I did, and even worse, I enjoyed kissing her."

"That's not a bad thing at all."

"But she pushed me away. It was as if she was scared of me…"

"Hm… Ichigo, sometimes, someone can be scared of how deeply they feel about another person."

Ichigo stared wide-eyed at his father. "Do you think that's why she pushed me away? Because she has feelings… for me?"

"That's the only possible explanation I can think of."

"But what if I don't know how I feel about her…"

"Think things through. And when the time is right, talk to her about it."

_He made things sound so easy_, Ichigo thought bitterly.

"I know it's not going to be easy," Isshin said, as if hearing Ichigo's thought. "But you're going to have to do so eventually. It's unfair to leave her hanging and wondering."

"I know…" After a pregnant pause, Ichigo continued, "How do I figure out how I feel about her?"

Isshin drew a deep breath. "You do care for her, right?"

"Yeah… Just the same as I did with my other friends."

"Look… I'm going to ask you questions. But you don't have to tell me your answers. You just need to answer them in your head."

"Okay…"

"Would you risk your life for hers?"

_Yes._

"Would you rather bleed from protecting her, than seeing her injured?"

_Yes._

"Do you feel lost when you realized that she had suddenly disappeared from your sight?"

_Yes._

"Does it irate you when someone acts disrespectfully towards her?"

_Yes._

"Does her feelings affect yours? Does it make you sad when she's sad?"

_Yes._

"And whenever she's sad, don't you ever wish you could make her smile again?"

_Yes._

"When you're fighting, when you're close to death, whose face did you see? Whose voice did you hear?"

_Hers…_

"Think these questions through, Ichigo. If you answered mostly yes, and if it's her face you saw, her voice you heard when you're on the verge of death, then you care for her more than as a friend."

Isshin patted his son's shoulder again.

"But for now, don't push her. She must have gone through a lot. The last thing she needs is a lovesick boy chasing after her."

_Lovesick boy?_ "The hell? Don't jump to conclusions!" Ichigo snapped, his face a deep shade of red.

"Yeah, whatever. You're not fooling me though."

Ichigo opened his mouth, ready to defend himself, but then decided against it. Instead, he thanked his father.

"Hm?" Isshin asked. He had expected more of Ichigo's witty comebacks.

"Thanks, Dad," Ichigo repeated.

Isshin shrugged his shoulders. "I'm just doing what any fathers would do."

"I started to realize why mom loved you."

A smug smile appeared across Isshin's face. "Took you long enough to realize that."

"And you owe me some explanations."

"Masaki! Our son is becoming more and more demanding!"

"SHUT UP!"

* * * * *

Unknown to Ichigo and his father, the subject of their conversation earlier, the auburn-haired healer was tossing and turning in her bed. She went to sleep after Ichigo left her room. But it wasn't the relaxing slumber she had hoped for.

Instead, it was bringing her a nightmare. Her subconscious mind was replaying what happened at the war over and over again.

"_Kurosaki-kun_…" she whispered helplessly into her blanket.


End file.
